Monday, February 26, 2007

Spaghetti Western Decadence

So I'm watching the Oscars, last night, and it suddenly dawns on me: This is why the terrorists hate us so much. Someone (here in the states) can be born in the poorest geographical location you can think of and, in the span of a few short decades, end up at a party wearing rocks that are worth more than the average person makes in five years. Now, granted, the same thing can be accomplished in Afghanistan, but it 's not nearly as posh and the rocks really are, well, rocks. And I'm sure that last night there was a group of terrorists sitting in a cave somewhere, watching the Oscars hoping to see Forest Whitaker win for his portrayal of Idi Amin and the more they saw, the more inflamed they became at us Westerners - like we're the rich land barons and they're the struggling peasants. We're probably very lucky that Forest won. Can you imagine the havoc that could have ensued if Peter "Lawrence of Arabia" O'Toole had won? Pandemonium.

Anyway, I'm thinking that maybe we should start filming movies in the Middle East. They obviously like being filmed - they make videos all the time - so eventually the terrorists would wind up as extras and as soon as one of them actually landed a speaking part, they're done. One speaking part would be enough for the 'acting bug' to infest the entire group. Then they'd want to direct and independent productions would start popping up and, before you know it, they'd want to be doing things their way and making their own decisions and running their own show and saying we're in the way and start trying to get rid of us and we'd want to stay because we'd be too embarrassed to leave so soon and not remain the shining examples of film making and, well, it would just be one big mess. Okay, never mind.

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